Tales From /lost+found 91: Christmas Special

Because this is short, here is an additional Christmas Miracle:

I have generally maintained that my private parallel universe is not any better than the one in which the rest of us live. But after the way 2016 has gone, I took a closer look. And here is a thing I found. In 2004, Republican Jack Ryan ran to replace the retiring Peter Fitzgerald as US Senator from the state of Illinois. He was forced to withdraw from that race due to a scandal stemming from revelations about his sex life that had come out during his 1999 divorce from actress Jeri Ryan. That divorce was likely precipitated in part by the strain on their marriage when Jeri Ryan started spending large parts of the year in Los Angeles while starring in Star Trek: Voyager.

Of course, one universe away, there was no Star Trek in the 1990s. We can’t necessarily draw any conclusions from that, but it’s reasonable to guess that the circumstances of the Ryans’ divorce would have been altered. Now, obviously, that doesn’t necessarily change the outcome in 2004; Ryan was trailing in the polls when he withdrew anyway. But it certainly would have been a closer race without the eleventh-hour switch in the ticket to the intensely unlikeable suspected carpetbagger Alan Keyes.

And who was the beneficiary of this shakeup in the Senate race? A charismatic up-and-comer whose election marked his entry to the national stage. Barrack Obama. So there’s a very real chance that in the next universe over, Barrack Obama’s political rise would have been delayed. Without Senator Obama, Hillary Clinton would almost certainly have been the Democratic nominee in 2008. Would she have beaten Senator McCain and his running mate, Tina Fey? Who can say. Would she have beaten Willard Mittens Romnworthy, the 2012 candidate from the state of R’lyeh? Who knows. But in such a world, she certainly would not have been running for election in 2016. Under the administration of Clinton, or even of Romney, there would have been no birther controversy (Probably not under McCain either, let’s be honest, but his legitimacy is questionable in much the same way Obama’s was. Which is to say, “Not at all questionable, but you could still make a dishonest argument that seemed superficially coherent”) to launch a particular reality show host into politics. No awful “She’s just as bad as him so why bother?” from the arrogantly clueless. No perfect storm breakdown in the rust belt.

I don’t really need to say it, do I? Yeah, I’m moving to that reality too.

Incidentally, a happy Christmas to you at home…

Doctor Who 2016 Christmas Special Script

Click to Embiggen

3×12: The Christmas Present: Sammy Lake never existed. Or did she? When Sammy sacrificed herself to destroy the Paradox Machine, her timeline should have been deleted from history. But a person whose entire life is tied up in paradox is not so easy to erase. The Doctor has one chance to resolve the timeline and save her companion. What will she risk, and what will it cost?

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