Blah Blah Cars Still Burn

Lex Luthor’s sidekick notices that someone’s nicked their stockpile of cash, and he freaks out and lays traps to catch the culprit, which proves that this guy is a fucking moron.
Somewhere between episodes seven and eight, they reveal that Zoot Suit Clockwork Orange is the father of Trudy’s still unnamed baby, which Bray reveals by bringing the craziest motherfraker in the city to their secret hiding spot, whereupon the guy who runs the craziest most ass-kicking gang in the city promptly trips over Lex Luthor’s shoe and falls to his death. Amber still has yet to say anything that sounds like natural dialogue for a person under the age of twenty-seven, but I’ve noticed that she sounds more American than anyone in the last four seasons of Power Rangers, and I’m including Jason David Frank. (She even says “Idear” instead of “Idea” the way that an American does when he’s pretending to have a British accent). Also, Amber has now said “poor little thing” about someone for about the one thousandth time. Everyone dresses up even more ridiculously than normal to hold a funeral for someone they don’t actually like to begin with, and they mention that “The graveyards are all full”, which means that as 99% of the population was dying of the virus, they at least had the consideration to bury themselves..
Also, I’ve determined that this show has something like 400 episodes, so from now on, I’m going to condense about five episodes per post.
Zoot is given a viking style burial with a funeral pyre on the beach. For this they need a boat, petrol and everything on the beach that burns. Bray also reveals that he knows Zoot’s real name, and it becomes clear to me fully 20 minutes before it does to everyone else that they were, in fact, brothers back before the apocalyse. Everyone wears silver eye makeup for the funeral and looks like extras from a Styx video. Amber lets her hair down and looks like Daryl Hannah in Clan of the Cave Bear, if you couldn’t afford the real Daryl Hannah and got, say, Lori Singer instead.
And in case we had any doubt that Zoot really is dead, they did the one thing that in the land of television guarantees that you can never turn out to have mysteriously survived what looked like certain death: they give him a “Yes, he’s really dead” montage, showing all the touching clips from Zoot’s tenure on the show. That is, they show the same clip of him shouting “POWER AND CHAOS!” that is part of the title sequence, and a scene from earlier in this very episode. Let’s face it, Zoot was not really a character, which is why I didn’t even mention his name until the previous post.
The Girl Who Looks like Magenta From The Rocky Horror Picture Show is much happier now that she knows Bray is unentangled, and, for that matter, now that Lex Luthor is officially a murderer, or, at least, a minor obstacle whose simple physical presence caused the death of what passes for a master villain in this show, Zandra stops fawning over Sidekick Boy and all but dry-humps Lex Luthor on the spot.

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